To my daughter:
Soñai Skye Vie
There are so many people that are excited to meet you.
I think no one is more excited (and all other emotions) than me.
In life... especially one similar to a fishbowl people will have many opinions, and random words of advice.
Both you and I will cling to God's Spirit and allow that to lead us as we move forward in all interactions.
With each kick you remind me that you're in there and just saying hey!
May is coming up fast stay well, warm and know I am presenting my body as best as I can as a living sacrifice - that scripture becomes so real now!
As a living vessel its an honor and blessing to be able to carry.
Our story is unique, special and in the end will be an inspiration to all.
Today February 15, 2023 = Week 25!!!
I've been feeling all sorts of kicks and movement. I stood in front of the bathroom mirror last night and witnessed the pokes from the outside lol. They're pretty cool. Makes you want to see it on an ultrasound in realtime what's going on and what's she's doing.
Symptoms up to this point:
Nothing really different to report. I've actually been feeling great in my body. I guess this is the sweet spot, honeymoon phase that the second trimester brings. I can stand at my job now freely with no issues of fatigue. I'm working at almost my usual pace and it feels good to be back in the swing of things with a few restrictions of course. Funny story, my store manager and I are taking a walk back to the office and he's steps ahead of me steady talking. Then looks back and realizes I'm waaaayy behind him lol. We laugh and he remembers to just slow down a bit since I can't walk that fast anymore.
Braxton Hicks, have I felt them? I believe so. They're not really that bad to be honest. It's just like they say a tightening of your uterus. I had some serious period cramps in my day so this was a walk in the park. Would I love to do a natural birth sure but in the grand scheme of things there's no gold star that you get for all naturale, c section, meds or no meds. The gold star is in bringing that soul safely from one realm into the next.
What I look forward to is the increase in my level of organization. I thrive when I have major responsibilities or people relying on me. Every few days I'm updating my todo lists on All Things Tiffany Jaye and making sure I check emails, phone calls, etc to get my daily tasks done.
What I don't like are some of the unsolicited advice or comments. The same comments an upcoming groom might get about marriage is how I feel sometimes about going into this pregnancy. I shouldn't have to say this but I'm smart and know how to do my own research. For my myomectomy I was 99.9% aware of everything I was walking into.
The "it's gonna be hard" or "you sure you can handle this?" I'm not really sure what that does. Some people I feel, this is my opinion, want to feel important and insert themselves to create a pedestal.
As far as advice, I like to keep it positive. If you've got to tell me something give it to me in that positive, negative, positive sandwich. Always end on a high note or else what's the point in spreading your own misery.
I will not let other people's anxiety dictate or control my mental status or decisions in life.
I observe, listen and decide for myself what's best. I have my "go to" people in my corner and quite frankly ... nah... I'll keep that to myself lol. If you know you know. That's all I'll say.
The father and I are making strides to take it one day at a time. Everything will work out and that's how I like to look at it. Keep it upbeat. It's so funny people are still asking... how does that help you ma'am, sir. You don't know him so let it go. If we choose to disclose then we shall. He'll be apart of the village as many others are. Life is a journey that doesn't have any straight lines. Some times you wake up and land somewhere completely unexpected. I'm sure that's what many of you thought.
2022 Timeline - Coco Passed, Uncle Junie Passed (dad's side), SXSW (music), Liana's Wedding, More Music, Granddad Passed, Fleet DJ Conference (music), Titans Weekend (dance), BAM!!!!! Pregnant whaaaaaa lol.
People I am a human being who's not exempt from all the shenanigans life can bring. I'm not perfect and in the midst of my travels God said now it's time. So here we are. I'm cool with it though. I'm 37 years old (some of yall don't even know lololol) so yeah let's do this now.
One thing that I do know and will be heavily refining and listening to is the Holy Spirit. My discernment has been on point my entire life. It's just learning to listen and know when it speaks and to not fight it. That's about it. It's a simple yes but when distractions, temptations, flesh and what you've been feeding yourself is all in the mix it makes it a lot harder to listen to and abide by.
If you want to be apart of my village subscribe to my website and keep up with All Things Tiffany Jaye (view the bottom of this screen). Once you sign up I'll see the subscription and make sure I keep you up to date. About myself and Soñai that will be here: www.mstiffanyjaye.com/diaryofablackmommy
Lastly I think, just ask and I'll help you say her name correctly lol. Yall take care and be blessed.