I'm back and BOOM!!!! IM PREGNANT! LOL
We all know the birds and the bees... yeah so here we are. I am thrilled to say that I am at the halfway point; as I'm writing this I am currently 20 weeks and 2 days - 21 weeks and 2 days.
Here are the initial FAQs and answers. I hope you enjoy this ride as much as me as we continue to live, love and do life together.
When are you due? May 31, 2023 (40 weeks) | However I will have a c-section around 37-38 weeks. Why? Veterans Day of 2020 I had a myomectomy which is a surgery to remove uterine fibroids. I had a total of 16 fibroids that weighed collectively 1.5lbs. So to avoid uterine rupture that could be fatal to both myself and the baby we will safely give birth by way of a c-section. If I happen to go into labor sooner than 37 than we will do an emergency c-section.
What's the gender? I have known the gender since week 11 when I got the results from my genetic testing. This is an advanced age pregnancy (geriatric) mean after age 35. I am currently 36 years of age and will give birth when I'm 37 (My birthday is Feb 13).
Medically you're opted into genetic testing and blood work to rule out any chromosomal issues. It's a simple blood test that also includes your 99.9% gender prediction. When the email came through with my results I was thrilled and shed a tear because I was glad I would get to use the name I've had in my back pocket since college if I ever were to have a child.
Have you felt the baby move yet? Yes! I've been feeling something that I couldn't explain or understand since around week 15 but I just wasn't sure. As I moved further along I told myself that's gotta be it. Then week 18 hit - I went for my anatomy scan. We viewed every part of baby's body literally. The entire process lasted about 45mins of pure awesomeness. Interesting moment, the technician was trying to scan the face and we could see baby move on the screen in real time. As I saw the baby move on the screen I was able to make the connection because I felt it as well. So its confirmed, yes I've been feeling baby move all this time. Week 20 has been monumental because the movements are very clear and distinct. Still small and subtle but I can tell. What I love is, this time I tried to see if I could feel the movements from the outside and I did twice!! So I look forward to more pokes from baby.
Who is the father? A fine gentleman who we will continue to pray for. God extends grace and mercy to us and I will forgive and extend the same towards him. I honestly pray for him everyday. The door is always open for him to be apart of our lives. I will only discuss what's necessary in relation to the uplifting of others on public platforms, everything else is personal and I'd like that to be respected.
[What is interesting that I do want to address, is when people make these wild accusations out of nowhere. I'm sure you're "trying to deduce" but what's unfortunate is you expose how little you know about me. My friends are my real friends and my love life is completely separate].
I'm highlighting two gentlemen DJ Cyclops and Rob. These two men I confide in a lot and they have helped me not self implode. It's very rare to find people who you can trust and they not want anything from you but for you to flourish and be your best self. Thank you both and tons of others: Lynwood, Devin, Lolo, OG Neil, Payne, Antoine Archer, FR Shawty, MajesticartbyChris, Demond, John, Herschel, Lethal Weapon, Jay Owens, CBthePoet, Cereon, Streetmadnessradio, Jared, DJ Spins, John Sigears, Xoitc.Wav just to name a few. Yes I have male friends whom I haven't been intimate with and it's a good to know that they have my back. I'm just thankful because life is tough.
Are you nervous? One thing I've learned about myself is I'm an artist pretty much at all times. So even as an expecting mother I look at the BIG day as kinda like a performance I'm preparing for. Am I nervous not now. I don't think I will be until the second I hear the first cry and they bring the baby to me. I do have thoughts of am I enough? Will they love me? Will they be able to know I'm their mother, distinguishing the difference between me and everyone else? I have general knowledge and plenty life experience. Working with children from newborn all the way to high-school for ten years and family experience with my nieces and nephew gives me ease that it's pretty much a walk in the park. Plus some long days, maybe sleepless nights and the ultimate test of endurance. Am I worried no. I believe I'll be just fine and I look forward to showing this little one all the cool things I know about the world and experiencing it through their eyes at the same time.
My Favorite Week? We 18 & 20! Week 18 I traveled to Houston, TX for the International Swing Dance Championships. Because I had made my pregnancy announcement a week prior I was met with warm hugs and lots of congratulations.
That made my heart smile to know that people were watching and really cared. It felt great to be welcomed as an upcoming mother and really was encouraged to keep the faith as I embarked on this new journey. Here's a clip of the first public dance with baby, Mom-to-be and Master Instructor Demond Carter:
Sitting at the Grown Table: The conversations I've been having are evolving. It's so funny everyone assumes my age and treats me as such versus how I'm presenting myself. I feel, I tend to get excluded from certain conversations or labeled as "green" when I've lived!!! There are things you may not know because you're not with me 24/7. Example when I told a story of a time I had gotten drunk during college, my music manager gasped as if I was still 16. LOL. Guys we weren't all born yesterday but I do get a lot of the age discrimination especially at work. Oh that was before your time "implying I was born in the 2000s and I must not know anything" Poor Gen Zs I won't treat you like this lol. Now, I don't believe as a woman you have to be married and have children to actually be considered a full woman, there is a bit of a rite of passage that happens when you cross over certain thresholds. Traditionally you are welcomed into this "club" and there's a general head-nod of an understanding. Which makes sense. I look at all moms and current pregnant women like - ok I get it now. I'm not alone and women have been doing this for years. It's going to be ok.
Symptoms: This is a boring section I think lol because I haven't had many. I do have the round ligament pain, lower back pain, the itchy belly and let's see difficulty sleeping as I get larger. Larger breasts, sore nipples during 1st trimester... now they're just heavy. I haven't gone up another cup size, they're just fuller and you know those clips in the back of the bra, it's on the last clip (widest) now. So my chest has expanded. Lastly I have rhinitis of pregnancy (pregnancy congestion). It sounds like a have a constant cold but it's just mucus build up. I'll literally wake up some mornings and all I'm doing is blowing my nose of nothing but clear snot.
Weight: My pre-pregnancy weight is 126lbs that's what I usually weight give or take 1 or 2 pounds. Now as of week 18 (my last weigh-in) I was 144lbs - that's 18lb gain. Not bad. Dr. wants me to gain up to about 30lbs. I definitely feel the heaviness when I walk up stairs, breathe, and when I dance in my heels. The balls of my feet and my calf muscles are working extra hard to hold the additional weight. Now I am still an athlete at my core. I ran track in middle and high-school, danced all throughout college and well into my adulthood. I also run on a track doing drills, sprints, lunges and occasional weight training for toning. All of these activities combined supply a great deal of accomplishment and I truly believe help me physically carry this child with ease.
A Rough Night:
Its currently Jan 19, 2023 2:07a this is the first night I've indulged into my insomnia. Most nights I would be extremely exhausted from the mental and physical weight of the day at work that I'd fall straight asleep after a fulfilling meal. Full and feeling fat I would roll over numerous times until I found a semi comfortable position and take 1 or 2 Benadryls (yes dr. approved) and go to sleep.
Stayed up until 5a and it was great minus the discomfort. Hadn't done that in a while.
So for a first time blog - update I think this is a good place to stop. We're at the halfway point and I look forward to the rest of this pregnancy and when baby arrives!!!
Y'all be blessed - subscribe to my mailing list if you haven't already and to stay updated.