You ever write something down in hopes God sees it. Like a letter to Santa Claus you wish upon a star and just want your immediate dreams to come true.
Usually I’d put on my headphones and dance (which I could do right now) because being happy or joyful is a choice. Just like love. These are actions we choose, not things that happen to us.
I recently prayed a prayer and went through with the necessary actions all on the “seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you”. And now that I have I felt good in the moment and even still… but there’s a slight emptiness. I’m sure it’s because I’m wallowing and worrying instead of letting it go.
My hope and prayer is to be married someday. Which day? It’s up to two people to decide but I haven’t met the other person yet. Or have I? Believing in the unknown is so hard especially when you don’t have anything to go off on. Yes I have the promises of God. I guess what I mean is each day I wake up and I see nothing in sight that gets me closer to the “said goal”.
I often say to myself “marriage” is that all that life is about? No. Because even after that wedding day there’s work to be done. It’s a partnership that you and another person have agreed to partake in.
Will I still sing, dance, draw, and do all of the wonderful things I do now in my marriage, most definitely yes! Am I reaching for the stars, yes! Again I often ask… in the deep recesses of my mind who would want to be married to me? Be with me, to hang out for a day is one thing. But a lifetime of Tiffany Jaye is another adventure. A huge exploration that requires lots of patience and effort.
I don’t want someone who’s afraid of asking me or expressing I want to get to know you. Just ask. All I can say is yes or no.
Being a wife isn’t the ultimate goal of life. It is one of them I’d like to accomplish.
Life doesn’t stop once you become a wife. It’s a new responsibility you agree to commit to, will adhere to and will cherish, to become.
Getting unnecessarily involved with people you know who aren't meant to be your husband is not a goal of mine.
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